Growing up I’ve always been the tallest or among the tallest everywhere I went. I love my height, I feel it’s a blessing but my big boned nature came with big feet and bulky knees. I find myself wishing I had tinier feet almost every day. Sadly, with feet like mine, you can’t get every shoe you want, so you already understand my frustration. Funny enough, most of the gifts I got as a child were shoes. Who’d imagine a 10-year-old with a 16-year-old kind of feet? You can imagine my sorrow when I try on those shoes and they don’t fit. So many years later, if you take a close look, you’d notice that my toes have little blisters from wearing tight shoes.
Everyone has insecurities at some point. Unfortunately, we have a picture of who a perfect person should be so we’re constantly hating our flaws. Today, I’m back with another talk. I’m not sure if I’ll be doing this every Monday but as I looked through these pictures, I realized how much I’ve come to embrace my fleshy knee and big feet and it inspired a new post. Ta-da!
If you’re struggling with any insecurities, here are 3 tips that could make you feel a lot better about the person you are.
INSECURITY ; ˌ/ɪnsɪˈkjɔːrɪti,ˌɪnsɪˈkjʊərɪti/
lack of confidence or assurance; self-doubt
*ACCEPT YOUR FLAWS
This isn’t as easy as it seems, if you have tried, you know what I’m talking about. But this point is most important. It could’ve been different, what if I had no feet at all? Whatever you’re battling with could be better but don’t forget the fact that it could’ve been also worse. Stop the COMPARISON. Whoever you deem perfect might not be after all. I want you to love every inch of your body. Nobody on this earth is like you, you’re unique and you’re beautiful no matter what. Once you’ve accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you.
* HAVE THE RIGHT MINDSET
Aside big feet, my weight fluctuates from an amazing size 10 lol to a size 14 and really, that’s fine. My body is going through a lot of hormonal changes and I’m not going to beat myself up for that but I know that at some point, I have to decide what size I want to be and maintain it. When I do that, it’ll be for ME, not some man or the friends that maybe constantly making fun of my size. That’s what I mean when I talk about having the right mindset. If your insecurity can be changed, have the right reason to change it. Not primarily for anyone but for yourself. As long as you’re happy, that’s all that matters because should that boyfriend walk out of your life, would you still wake up in the morning and hit the gym? If your answer is no, sweetie, you have to evaluate yourself.
*SET ACHIEVABLE GOALS
Now, you’ve identified your flaws, you’ve come to terms with them- confident in your skin. Great! Can anything be done about it? No, why bother? Yes, really, why bother. Let’s take my big feet for example. I can’t really do much about it even though, I admit I have googled ‘how to shrink your feet’ at some point in my life lol. Somethings can barely be changed. If it eats you up that much, wake up every morning and instead of bothering about how crooked your legs are, remind yourself of how lucky you are to have them and be grateful for them.
If your insecurity can be reversed well, hallelujah! Set achievable goals. You can’t weigh 130 kilograms and want to be 70 kilos in the next week. It’s not feasible. That’s how you get discouraged. Rather set goals that you can attain and when you see results, it’ll motivate you to push harder. Eat right, work hard not forgetting that you are on earth but for a time and you want to live in the most healthy and comfortable body ever. If its braces you need, go get it. I’m not a huge supporter of surgeries but if you think you need it that bad well, it’s your body. Don’t allow your flaw to drain your self-esteem by sitting around and crying about it. Rather, get up and step out of it.
Finally I’ll leave you with a quote from Owen Campbell Jnr. That says; ‘happiness means loving yourself and being less concerned with the approval of others’.
As you embark on a journey towards self-love and personal growth, I hope you put yourself first as often as you have to. And while you are at it, here are a few pictures of me showing off my bulky knees and a gentle reminder that we all have flaws.What we make of them define us.
. I have shared my little insecurity story, what is yours?
Until next time, peace and productivity.